Mr Sweden

My sweet Mr Sweden. It all started with ‘Hey’ and a not-so-impressed Special K (that’s me btw). For you see, as I have discussed in a previous post, I have very specific standards that I select the guys I want to date. I just thought his opening was slightly unoriginal and that is why I brushed it off for a couple of days and then one lonely evening I decided to come back to it. He was so completely blonde, blue eyed and tall. I mean everything about him screams out Swedish. It’s so god damn perfect; it makes question why previous endeavours to produce the perfect race didn’t end up in Scandinavia. I continued the conversation and asked him how he was. It seems conversations in Tinder often start in three ways:

  • Hey, how are you? (most common)
  • Something funny
  • A sexual reference (least common, but more commonly this comes out a day or two later)

We continued our option one discussion in a very typical option 1 manner by asking about each others jobs. It’s an important question, as I have tried dating outside of the professional group and realised I just can’t relate to those people. This question now forms part of my checklist, but I have reached a new level of Tinder professional by being able to guesstimate their field by their pictures. He was unreadable though. How irritating.

As Option 1 conversations often go, they often die out (80% of them time), but we went on to diversify into other topics and he seemed to show a real interest in me. Something about him felt genuine. I perused it on gut feeling alone. I mean the blonde hair blue eyed was nice but not what I am used to, but there was just something about him.

He finally asked me out after quite a lot of probing. At every stage of the process he seemed to be careful. For example, he started telling me about the different types of wine they have in Prague. I told him about my newly found passion for wine and he later confessed that helped him determine our first date location. He seemed to want to know what I was made out of. I mean it’s unusual to dig into such substance at such early stage which made me more intrigued. I told him about my love of restaurants and being a self certified foodie. He arranged a first date at Restaurant Ours. I was super impressed, as the chef had worked under Rene Redzepi who ran the world famous Noma restaurant. I mean he probably couldn’t have done better for a first date.

When we met, I had been dropped off at the wrong location and walked for ages trying to find this place. I was quite thirsty so I drank a lot. As I got quite drunk, he sussed this and started asking probing questions, such as ‘when my last relationship was?’ Usually that would be far too deep for a first date but what the hell, I tell it all to him; I tell him more than he asked and probably wanted to know. Babble mode is on. This is the reason I should not drink. I carefully analyse his reaction, as I saying ‘I was engaged …’. Not much. He’s not impressed or worried. He’s just watching from his side line. I now just want to push him off and over the edge.

His accent was mild and delicious. There was a hint of everything in there. He was so international. He talk with such a relaxed manner. It’s as if he is sitting on the side line observing the world rather than being part of it. He seems like he’s not phased by the crap in this world and generally is living at peace with himself. I was so mesmerised and was trying hard not to drool all over him. I am quite expressive with my hands and there is just tonnes of drama in tone. I think I am the kind of person that can make even make a walk to Sainsbury’s an exciting event.

Sitting across the table from me he is rather dashing! He looks at me and our eyes meet. They lock for an instance. I need to look away, as if I stare at him for too long then my eyes will give it all away. He will know that I have already planned our Swiranian babies and want to scream out I love everything about him so far. He will know I am tempted to kiss him. I can’t have that. No! No! No! I am a respectable woman. I break eye contact and look side to side, the ceiling and behind me. My head must be looking like I am having some kind of epileptic fit but it doesn’t seem to have put him off much. Every time I turn around his eyes are still locked in the same place with a glow that is warmer than an external observer of the world. Who on earth is this blondie and why am I attracted to him so much?

The night comes to a close and he orders a taxi. Now, being extremely drunk I probed him in the same manner as he did to me . I asked him about his ex-girlfriend at the back of the taxi. He kept it short and not so sweet: it was a four year relationship and he had to break it off as he was moving to the UK for his job. Clearly he has no babble mode. He stopped there. I went back to my playground days and threw a cheap punch in a flippant manner: ‘so you’re selfish and put your career above your relationship’. I mean it was harsh but I am a difficult girl to handle. I needed to know he could take it. He hesitated for the first time. He then apologised and asked if that was an issue. Of course I did not care what he did to his ex. He seemed somewhat remorseful about his actions as he collected his thoughts. The taxi came to a halt and he descended fully composed.


I didn’t like his relationship answer, but I have decided not to judge him based on that. I have come to believe people are not or bad. People are just limited. How could I judge him based on a relationship he had from 21 to 25? He was a young boy growing up, experiencing love, developing himself. The mistakes he made from 21-25 were based on the limitations he had then and the remorse seems to show he may have come out a better person. Regardless, I intend on finding out more.


The next day he didn’t text me at all. Usually he is the one that initiates the texts, but I knew he had a busy time at work the next day. At 8pm I got sick of waiting, so I texted him. He mentioned he had been busy in his texts and asked me out again for a second date. He was off to Paris for a couple days so we arranged for a day that he returned.


Criteria Score
Offered to pay the bill Yes
Insisted on paying the bill Yes
Politeness 5
Ambitious 5
Looks 5






3 thoughts on “Mr Sweden

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